Taking a pot-shot at the technical wonks at the UCI, Pearl Izumi is promoting its ‘Speed Shop’ clothing with a very funny video viral.
IFAC security guards chase down cyclists and strip them of their performance-enhancing clothing. In a spoof press conference, Italian Nunzio Castinetti (why not an Irishman?), the president of the International Federation Apparel Compliance is shown hating on Pearl Izumi clothing for being too technical; they are "weapons of mass acceleration."
Bernard LeBoef, Managing Rules Director of IFAC says wearing such clothing is not on: "Cycling is supposed to be…miserable."
In a letter to Pearl Izumi, the IFAC president says his organisation’s mission is to maintain "an equal and fair
playing field for all cyclists," a clear reference to the UCI’s supposed aim of a ‘level playing field’ for cycling tech.
The spoof IFAC letter says: "We have recently obtained and are testing sample garments used by professionals you support and believe that they utilize construction and technologies that violate I.F.A.C. Art. 1.242.65 banning all apparel from competition that gives the rider a ‘clear and significant unfair advantage’…
"Effective immediately, the I.F.A.C. has issued a ban on all ‘performance enhancing apparel’. Any rider caught wearing apparel will be detained, questioned and have their gear confiscated for testing. The I.F.A.C. will not stop until our sport is returned to a state of fair equality."